Letter to Mum

Mom, please don’t feel guilty
It was just my time to go.
I see you are still feeling sad,
… And the tears just seem to flow.
We all come to earth for our lifetime,
And for some it’s not many years
I don’t want you to keep crying
You are shedding so many tears.
I haven’t really left you
Even though it may seem so.
I have just gone to my heavenly home,
And I’m closer to you than you know.
Just believe that when you say my name
I’m standing next to you,
I know you long to see me,
But there’s nothing I can do.
But I’ll still send you messages
And hope you understand,
That when your time comes to “cross over,”
I’ll be there to take your hand.

A Honest Prayer

Dear God,

Please God I pray that I will not have to endure the heartbreak of losing my baby again, I just can’t do it if it happens again it will surely break me, please i beg you for a happy ending this time I understand Michael was not meant for this earth i believe everything that transpired from the point of Michael’s conception to his death was meant to be, you knew God that if i knew from early on that my baby couldn’t be saved and that his death was inevitable i would have lost it, i would not have been able to function, i look back at the comedy of errors and see it as a gift.

Deep down I am scared of what will happen to me and my family if we lose this baby that is growing inside of me, I already love him, i sob uncontrollably just thinking about losing this one too, I know i have no control over it it’s all in your hands God but please answer my prayers and keep this baby safe, keep it growing and give me the strength and inner peace to put one foot in front of the other everyday until the time comes where hopefully he will enter this world and join this family.

I think of Michael every single day and my heart aches for him but i know he is in heaven with you and my Nene and he is so happy in a beautiful, happy and peaceful place and i pray that one day i am fortunate enough to join him in your heavenly kingdom.

I love you God


Mixed Emotions

Hi Everyone,

I really need to get all my feelings out, I currently have them all bottled up inside but unfortunately tonight i have run out of time so hopefully i can return tomorrow to divulge all my feelings about this “NEW” pregnancy that i am still finding hard to believe is actually real. Oh and i can’t believe Kim Kardashian is having a baby around the same time as me, she is of Armenian background just like me and we seem to have the same body type, extremely curvy the difference is she has had some fabulous work done to put the curves in the right places and i just look like a good year blimp hehehehe…TO BE CONTINUED Image